Waiting on the Lord
Updated: Mar 22, 2022
Justina Ghali I 24 September 2019
Justina is a current undergraduate student majoring in Speech Pathology and Audiology at the University of Texas at Dallas. She currently serves as the Social Coordinator of her OCCM chapter.
Tick, tick, tick…I woke up that Friday morning with the sun shining down on my face as I rolled over to check the time. Thirty minutes to go and I would find out whether or not I got the Peer Advisor (PA) position. I got up from my friend’s couch and paced the floor aimlessly trying to pass the time. This wasn’t just any position; it was one that I had been praying about for months, asking for God to do what He saw best but that didn’t pacify my nerves.
I started the process in late November and my friend, Youstina, had told me about how being a PA was one of the most rewarding and diverse experiences she’d had at UT Dallas. I decided to apply and waited to hear back all winter break. I passed through the application section and had moved on to the interview portions – four rounds of nerve- racking interviews waiting to hear if I had made it to the next. Finally, it was mid – March, time to find out what had been decided.
“Did you get the email yet??” Tina texted me asking if I had received the final email. I opened the app with shaking hands and clicked on the email. I didn’t have to read very far to know that the absence of a “congratulations” indicated that I hadn’t received it but after reading further, I found that I had been placed on the waitlist. Great. Now I had to keep waiting, with a sliver of hope, that I might get it or end up disappointed…again. I cried, not out of anger, because I only wanted the job if God saw it fit, but from the sadness of what could have been. Anyone who knows me knows patience is not my best virtue, but if only I knew the plans God had for me.
Fast forward to July 23 rd . I’m in Egypt and I decide to check my email. I open it up and to my surprise, there’s an email titled Peer Advisor Position. Nervously I open it and read that I’ve been placed in the apartments – not my top choice – but all of a sudden I’m debating whether or not I should take it, whether or not I’ll have enough time to move in the day I land back, among many other things. I emailed the coordinator back with a list of questions asking for a few days to think on it. I prayed and prayed, asking God to show me whether or not I should take it and move out. I got an email back that Monday morning saying the position had been filled due to time and I was back on the waitlist. Once again confusion and disappointment seemed to fill my heart and I questioned God saying “what are You doing, what are You trying to teach me, Lord?” If only I knew. I started school and got back into my routine and that’s when I received the phone call. I checked the voicemail and there was an invitation to move into my first choice: the Residence Halls. Exactly what I wanted, at exactly the right time. God knew that if I had gotten the job at any other time, I would’ve had to go through extensive training for two weeks; something I couldn’t afford to spend my time on, as I had to focus on a major exam coming up a few weeks later.
I had been waiting and waiting for this phone call asking that God only give it to me if He knew I could handle it, if He knew it would be good for me. The entire process, I didn’t know what to think. I didn’t know what God was asking of me or where He was leading me. I thought that maybe after I didn’t get the apartment that He was trying to tell me to close the door, to let it go.
Only after everything started falling in place did I remember that I had asked Him to test me in my faith to see if I would hold on and lean onto Him in a vulnerable state or if I would push and lose trust in Him. Waiting on the Lord isn’t easy, it’s hard, it’s exhausting and sometimes I got tired of waiting. I’m here to tell you that whatever you’re praying for, ask for His will and He will shower you with blessings that you never thought possible. Set your eyes on Him and build that close relationship with Him so that you can hear His voice. His timing is never late, never early. It’s perfect. I look back on this experience and the timing of everything couldn’t have been more perfect. Hold onto Jesus and never let go because He is the only One who can give you comfort, the only One who knows what is best for you and “where He guides, He provides” (Isaiah 58:11) He never sends you anywhere without being right there with you. A verse that I held onto was Romans 8:28 “all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose” nothing can be said/done without His permission for “high officials watch over higher officials and higher official over them” (Ecclesiastes 5:8) God rules over higher officials. He is ALWAYS in control, He carries the whole world in His hands and He’s got you.